Online dating is all the rage these days, and I am sure there are droves of people out there who’ve claimed success with it, but I for one am a non-believer. Easy ladies.. I did not say Belieber. He’s a whole other bag of wormy issues I would suggest avoiding. 😀
My friend however, is not so fortunate. She came to the conclusion the guys she was meeting were jerks and totally obsessed with one thing. That one thing of course, was not her wonderful mind, but something baser. She decided to listen to all the well-meaning voices around her suggesting that she give online dating a shot, because after all, the guys would have to get to know her for her mind first right? -insert laugh here- Yeah.. right.
I warned her that it wouldn’t change anything, and that for all she knew she would be conversing with hairy old men, sitting naked in front of a laptop, and doing disgusting things with her pictures while scratching
fondling their unmentionables. She insisted it couldn’t hurt and made a profile on a free online site known as OkCupid.
She was mistaken. Her sense of smugness over my being wrong barely lasted a day before the messages began pouring in. Her message box was filling up with choruses of “what’s up baby?” – “You so hot” – “wanna get high?” and other juicy morsels like “you so sekksy [sic]” and “we should make babbies [sic] together.”
After nearly peeing myself from laughing at her expense, I was pleased to offer her a big fat I told you so, before convulsing into maniacal laughter once more. She refused to answer any of the asinine messages and quickly learned that this venture was a bust and was considering closing the whole page down, when another little gem hit her inbox and after she shared it with me, I begged her to let me answer it. Seriously, I shit you not, I begged. It was too good not to be responded to by none other than yours truly. 😀 She gave me her password/login and I went to work.
Be forewarned that I use a wee bit of profanity and I talk as ghetto as he obviously thinks he is. 🙂
I give you, for your amusement.. exhibit A:
For the record, she asked me to make sure it was understood she is NOT old, and in fact only 24, but hey.. I guess that’s a grandma to this handsome puffed up devil eh? 😀
I can’t help but wonder what his response will be to her.. but it’s probable that it won’t be in proper English and not very likely, that it will be nice, so I suggested she make use of the block key. She’s not good at listening though. If you’re reading this post, you know it’s true. 😛
So what do you think dear readers? Are you for or against online dating sites? What did you think of my response to him? Was I too harsh? 😀