Overwhelmed, Party of One

So what do you do when there is simply not enough paycheck in the whole, paycheck to paycheck story of your life? If you’re like me, you lose your freaking mind. You stress and you cry… you try to figure out if the check being short was somehow your fault 2124666b0efb7ebad8267f39a1d61117or if the place you work for made a mistake. Usually, none of these are even in the ballpark, and it almost always comes down to just not enough hours worked, and you were so busy busting your hump that you forgot minimum wage sucks ass.

If you’re lucky these sorts of things don’t happen very often, but when they do they can make an already difficult life feel almost unbearable. Yesterday was just that sort of day for me. It’s rent day. In my opinion, one of the worst days to exist every single month. It’s the one day a month that I sadly watch as almost 2/3 of the money coming into this house, goes right back out into the hands of property managers who have consistently sucked at doing repairs; failed to snow shovel my roof and could have caused it to collapse on all our heads; and told me that the swarm of yellow jackets that decided to nest in the paneling of my door (thousands of them) they were supposed to have repaired, were my responsibility to get rid of despite my extreme fear of bees in general. They also left me stranded in my driveway for over two weeks last winter due to heavy snow that they never came to plow even though it’s a private drive and not the cities responsibility. All these things do not add up to me being even the tiniest bit happy to watch them abscond with so much of the money we need to live on every month. Yet what can you do right? It’s a bill so you pay it. End of story.

Well, not so much. When the paycheck doesn’t match the need, then what? Where do you turn? Relatives? Not in this lifetime. Read my poems. They suck and not one of them would lift a finger. 7589fb02317886fd60963989949696daWell, maybe one, but technically they are no longer family after the divorce and I already owe them more than I can even begin to keep count of. Welfare programs? Churches? Not this girl. I tried that whole government thing. I was the one that told them to shove it and walked away. Their idea of assistance was $400 a month and then I was to work 35 hours per week at some location of their choice. I couldn’t believe they were serious. $400 at 32 per week? 138 hours per month. Anyone know what that amounts to per hour? Well, I will tell you. It’s a wage of $2.90 per hour. Who the hell would agree to that? Oh, I know there are a lot of people living off the system right now, but they must be bonkers because no one in their right mind would agree to work for $2.90 per hour.

So now we are back to what is one to do when rent is due and there isn’t enough money to pay it. Honestly, your guess is as good as mine. Right now the plan I have gone with is putting off paying anything until this coming Monday so that I can have the weekend to think things through and come up with a plan to grovel and ask for more time. It’s a shitty plan, but all I have at the moment. This is the first time this has happened to me since my son moved away 3 years ago. I’m not even sure why it’s happening now except like I mentioned earlier….reduced hours. I continue to be amazed at how shitty life can be sometimes. ea75911393dfe77fa1fd95fb4be01ec6I’ve scoured the closets for something to sell, but let’s face it… anything worth selling has been long gone a while now. To the rich, $200 is a sneeze into a silken hanky, but to me, it might as well be a million dollars. It’d be easier to knock off a bank than to simply come up with that much money.

Hey, now there’s an idea. Hope someone has bail money…. b1f9cdb8747b66edb7587c798153d4bf--emoji-emoticon



10 thoughts on “Overwhelmed, Party of One

  1. The while bank thing, totally not worth it. I know the feeling,I get paid monthly…..very monthly it seems sometimes and it’s always a struggle coming up into the last two weeks 😦
    Here’s hoping a bit of luck domes your way x

    • Oh gosh no. It’s a fantasy of mine that one day I will awake to find all my bills paid, my fridge filled, my gas tank not on E, and STILL have even a $100 in my bank account. That would be living! Ha! lol 😋

      • I have that same fantasy! But no doubt, some emergency would come up to take that extra $100. LOL There was an extra pay-period for us last month and I got a little excited, but alas, the car needed new tires – all 4 of them 😦

        • Oooh I love those extra payday months like a fat kid loves cake! You’re right though, something always comes up last minute like to run away with the extra cash, and thumb it’s nose at you. 😕

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